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Fake Your Own Death

by TRUTH IN SILENCE

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1.
2.
I believe I was paralyzed and I was paralyzed I want to be something more than you believe And I'm catatonic in front of these answers No friend of mine would be Catatonic in front of these exits Just pass the time with me Supersonic collisions abound But no one sees No one hears the sound Nobody hears the asteroids Circling round our heads No one moves Nobody makes a sound For fear we will destroy The glass we can't anoint To contain the longing in our chests I want to be something more than you believe Glass can't contain me Seeks to profane me Nobody speaks in the tongues of careless longing youth
3.
City 05:41
It's called the curtain call it's blank and neatly drawn your forest in photographs I took but I didn't know I would have to look It's called the one in all and it breathes down your neck but I didn't know I'd write this check Full speed to the city all around me your supersonic eyes so they see in the dark, do they? Could you tell me could you tell me if they delay the tip of my tongue and I will not depart this riverside paid with my life though I will not rebirth in sacrifice Was it worth it? To build this up? Was it worth just delaying your burial? I long to see this city underwater oh friend of mine your supersonic eyes If only it were quiet I wanna be there but I don't want to go very far If you are the dreamer, I am what you dream But when you want to wake, I am your wish I would like to step out of my heart and go walking beneath the enormous sky I long to see this city underwater oh friend of mine your supersonic eyes If only it were quiet I wanna be there but I don't want to go very far If only it were silent A chorus of shattered glass Turn myself into a star's vast silence Above the strange and distant city of time Carry on my river Go on home my river Safely my river go safely my river Save me my river
4.
You fell for it I don't believe I got your name I would like to go walking in the sunlight Every house is connected by invisible seams that tear apart your heartstrings I don't fear that cautious demonstration of affection from neighboring directions But let's turn our eyes to the stars For in the skies we are not apart
5.
6.
I fell for my homeland I tried but I can't to find out where I end and the dream begins I fell through my own ways hysteria in my gaze as the parting train stole its shadow You may never know what light hides beneath its sole but the sole province of death No, you will not rest I pray the past is real Though never brought to heel by Sole conscious day Breathing away the fog of where I lay I remember when I thought I was in a movie about nothing except what happens when your mind's running thin on reasons to enjoy the place you're in I pray the past is real Though never brought to heel by Sole conscious day Breathing away the fog of where I lay I'll lie abed for a while and take apart my ceiling tile Live in dreams for a while where there's no space and I am the space I tried to find my homeland I tried but I can't to find out where I end and the dream begins It's the sole province of death
7.
Mantra 03:53
Time means breathing underlines the steady passing of all our hopes and our dreams and they're coming for you I don't want to be a part of it but you insist, if you insist, don't you? The paralyzed's got a new pair of shoes with which to keep his cold feet in till he's willing to move Another bell rings out from up clear a remonstration of my patience with my mantra for years saying I don't want to be a part of this, but I exist, yet I exist, don't I? Time means breathing underlines the steady passage of All our hopes and our dreams and they're coming for you Love I'd walk back but I feel like I'd get stopped in my tracks paralyzed I realize if you miss it there's no Time means breathing underlines the steady passage of
8.
I never thought I would miss the soul-searing bliss of cantankerous winds tearing up my lids I never thought I would miss it I would upend your skies If it'd open your eyes I won't choose to wander the boulevards anymore Up and down, restlessly While the dry leaves blow up through me I would upend your skies If it'd open your eyes I would open your wounds If it meant you'd leave sooner than I would open your eyes To see just in time
9.
This is where I lay that is where I'm going to be found in a aspen grove among the pine wood I hope you regret dying We collapse our moment is dead and we were using our senses to defy what we saw a dimension from ahead ahead of me now I hope you regret dying You're always living in the corner of your eye I wish I'd lost my mind You're always searching out the corner of your eye I wish I'd lost my mind If you are who I think you are then you might be the one to eradicate my undying loveless gaze but chances are you are not (anything from not this Earth's wrought) and the feeling's almost gone from when I was Sheltered by your canopy eternal pour of rain translucent fabric a membrane of our memories I've made a tent of it to live amongst the fairies and psychotropic flora I want to see you in divine estuaries between the sky and my delirium And I've made a tent of it to live amongst the fairies and psychotropic flora I think you know what's been hiding between spheres that are taking up our orchestrated scenes I think you know what's been hiding from me I think you know I think you know my secrets I think I know your regrets I think about every time You walked around without a glance I wish I'd lost my mind You're always searching in the corner of your eye As if you wanted to see past the window of this life We woke up in a cabin all to ourselves we were looking for a way out in the dead of winter our breath hung in the air a cruel vapor reminder of your ghostly presence and there was no world outside of sweet mummifying heat of logs gently cracking under horrifying entropy the lonely bird sang its last elegy there's a whisper in the wood tempting all of those who would hear its name to be saved from pain though it remains a lie a lullaby for those who are looking for a way out under the snow-laden boughs of our aspen grove Will you walk with me one final time before the world swallows us into its irreversible tract I pray this happened to me, sometime Don't look back on that autumn when I pretended we knew each other And the joyous beautiful solipsism of the autumn after I wish I'd lost my mind And I think you know that Don't look back, do not look back Don't wake up, do not wake up

credits

released November 23, 2018

The lyrics for "City", "Sun/Sunflowerless", and "Upend/The Rustle of Fall" contain lines, both verbatim and modified, from the poems "I am, O Anxious One...", "Lament", and "Autumn Day" by Rainer Maria Rilke, translated from German by Stephen Mitchell.

All sounds are created by silence.

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